Loss

Whistles blow regularly here. It is the community method to announce a death—a person is appointed to walk through the neighborhood, blowing a loud whistle, then yelling the name of the person who died and when the funeral will happen. Many people will meet this person on the path, and give money towards the funeral.

The longer you live here, the more personal these announcements become. A repairman who worked on your house. A neighbor. A friend’s child.

This week, however, it was news from home. David has been part of our lives for about 6 years. Though they chose to not get married, my mother and he functioned as though they were, and they had planned to grow old and retire together. They were inseparable.

Cancer, however, blunted that reality. The prognosis looked good, and the cancer seemed manageable, until the cancer unexpectedly roared back, taking over the liver, and shutting down his body before the doctors discovered that the presenting issue—pneumonia—was actually a symptom that was drawing attention away from the core issue. By the time they knew, it was too late.

We had been sending text messages back and forth with my sister as events unfolded, and finally got the phone call 3 am Friday morning. My sister tearfully reported that David had just passed away.

I had begun making travel plans when my sister conveyed my mom’s preference that I instead wait and maybe I, along with Charity and the boys, could come for Christmas, when losses are most deeply felt. We hope to honor her wishes by doing so.

David Hunter was a good man with a tender heart, an amazing cook, an avid reader, a lover of sports (especially tennis, F1 car racing, and women’s hoops), playful with children (Josiah has lot’s of great memories of him), servant-hearted, and always a joy to be around—assuming he had had his coffee or chocolate.

He is greatly missed.